Wherefore art thou, Medellinas?

The bus ride is cold. As wonderfully congenial as Cindy and the rest of our staff were at getting us on the bus, they did nothing to prepare us for the hyperactive air conditioning. By the end of the night, I had pulled on a pair of pants to cover my legs, was wearing two bandanas, one on my head and one on my face, and had added a long sleeved shirt and my rain jacket to keep myself warm enough to sleep. I wish someone had taken a picture. I looked like a crazy person.

The night was pretty long and every time I woke up it looked like we were driving through clouds. Around 8 in the morning, the conductor woke everyone up for a breakfast break about 90 minutes from the Medellin bus station. Jasper, my traveling partner at the moment, and I are not really enticed by the “cooked” offerings at the roadside café, so he introduces me to a strange oatmeal/milk drink that is quite tasty and will soothe an empty stomach.

The bus ride in to the city shows a Jason Statham movie all in Spanish. Again, you really don’t need to hear the words to understand it. I love action shows.

The Medellin Metro system is unlike anything I have seen outside of dominant 1st world countries. It is spotlessly clean, runs on time, and has everything I would expect from announcers to proper signage. It even has a line that runs directly from the northern bus terminal where we are arriving that runs directly through the Poblado district where we’ll be staying. Since Jasper seems to have such a handle on things, I’m just going to crash at the same hostel he had picked out.

Medellin is similar to every other city I have visited in that no one knows where anything is. At least the people seem to know what street they are standing on.

Black Sheep hostel is outfitted for everything. It is a little hard to spot, because the only signage is a tile in the garden wall that has a cartoony black sheep drawn on it. I almost followed Jasper straight past it.

Black sheep has plenty of computers, a couple televisions, lots of sleepeing space and good wireless connectivity and speed everywhere. Wonder of wonders: they have REAL HOT WATER. Not the strange electrical showerheads by a gigantic water heater (or 3) that puts hot water to all the sinks and showers. It’s a miracle; just like Black Jesus.

It is also absolute chaos. There are nearly 40 people leaving this morning, so Jasper and I are left to wander and chill out for an hour or so until the egress has been processed. The owner, Kelvin, sets us up in a 4 bed room with no one else in it.

In Medellin, often in the afternoon they have a phenomenon they call a sunshower. This is simply a short rainstorm that pushes in and rains for 30-60 minutes and then is pushed out again by the sun. It’s quite nice and with the aid of my trusty umbrella, I decide to go exploring in a Colombian sunshower. There are plenty of people out walking and I find that they are constantly willing to smile back and offer kind words.

Much of the Poblado district looks similar to other places I have been, but they have fantastic murals in places. This one in particular I went back to find and take a picture of it. It was just too wild not to share. I can not stop laughing.

I mailed off some amazingly expensive postcards and went grocery shopping for the next couple days at a store similar to Wal-Mart called Exito. I have discovered how I will become filthy filthy rich. Cranberries sell for over $120,000 pesos per kilogram. That is over $60; about $30 a pound. All I have to do is create a demand and start shipping them down. Playboy Mansion, here I come.

Jasper has left by the time I return so I decide to set out, unsuccessfully, in search of a barber and coffee in the city center, Parque Berrio. The city center is decidedly unremarkable; except for this guy.

The only coffee to be had is from some strangely homeless looking guys walking around with carts and a thermos of brown liquid balanced atop. No, thanks. The super bonus surprise for the day is watching all the naked hobos bathing in the run off on the river banks while riding the Metro back to Poblado; sorry folks no pictures this time.

The night is pretty chill around Black Sheep. Some movies are played, the same 4 people that have been on the patio since I arrived are still sitting on the patio discussing something. I choose to make some guacamole out of the excellent array of vegetables I purchased earlier.

It is a hit, as usual. Jasper makes the comment that I will never lack for friends or company anywhere I go as long as I produce this guacamole. It is my own personal brand of How to Win Friends and Influence People. Also, they sell avocados here that are nearly the size of my face. I decided to experiment with two kinds of chips: SuperNacho vs. TacoNacho. Behold!

The morning brings lovely breakfast in the form of granola and lactose free milk that I found in Exito. There is a pot of coffee and a large container of sugar and ants next to it. I’m going to Bucaramanga soon specifically to eat large fried ants, so I figure, “who am I to turn my nose up at this?” Sugar and sugar ants alike go into my coffee. I am the Medicine Man.

Not that I don’t love Medicine Man Coffee, but Jasper has some friends at a hostel around the corner that really has what is called “onda” or a vibe. Pit Stop Hostel has exactly that. There is a bar on the premises, the girls working there are much cuter than Kelvin, there is a swimming pool; the list goes on. It really has some nice finishing touches that make it a more enjoyable place to be. The price is a little bit cheaper too, so the two of us move our stuff over there before taking off on an adventure.

Today, I am going to tag along with Jasper to check out the cable car that runs above the city. It is supposed to be quite a sight and even goes to a park of some repute at the top. As you can see, it is one heck of a view. We met a couple tour guide kids that tag teamed their story out, some wild taffy puller, and all manner of things.

The park at the top has been under construction for some time and, from what I can tell from talking to the locals, this section has only been open for 2 weeks. There is a lot going on, and some works well, and some does not. Jasper and I find a map that shows waterfall nearby and take off in search. Somehow I thought it would be bigger.

On the way back, we found a Boy Scout camp and several members of the Armed Forces out patrolling, assumedly to keep an eye out for FARC. They were pretty cool guys.

I am constantly bathed in warm smiles and half understood conversation. I start talking to some random old woman and she happens to have several friends nearby from South Carolina. They are native Colombians, but live in the US now. When they leave, a diminutive woman comes up and sits down with me and just starts talking away. She and her similarly dressed friends are members of a 50 and over women’s group that does nature walks and exercises together. Pretty rad people. They loved the two gringos.

Medellin is spoken of in every place in the world as a city of strikingly beautiful women. The rumor goes that the city is simply filled with them. I have not found this to be true. Perhaps it is because with very few exceptions, I have not historically been attracted to Latin American women. Not to say that the city is ugly. It is by far more attractive in populace than anywhere I have visited thus far in my trip this year.

The mayor, alcalde, here is doing some great things. They started a number of urban renewal projects in some of the most dangerous barrios in the city. Starting with this fantastic library, but continuing on to so many other things, including frisbee with some of the local kids.

In an effort to soak up some of the nightlife and people watch, Jasper and I head back to a Thai restaurant near Poblado and settle in for some grub. Jasper’s vegetarian Pad Thai is by far the best thing that hits the table. Also, 3 for 1 drinks will catch up with you, regardless of how strong they are.

Jasper and I spend the rest of the night wandering around this center of activity with bars and restaurants and a quite nice coffee bar and he tells me about what it means to be South American and in a place like this. This is a haven for conspicuous consumption. A South American person would not come to Juan Valdez Coffee and grab a cup to go. They would come here as a special trip and get coffee and sit near the sidewalk to be seen drinking said coffee. This sort of thing is a luxury. These relatively affordable restaurants are a place to go “be seen” and “be fabulous” there is no rush here, and if you look from the street a restaurant seems to be packed, but once you enter, it is only because everyone in the place has been seated right next to the sidewalk, while every other table in the place sits empty. This sort of thing blows my mind. I sit back and take a little time to evaluate my own behavior in life and see where I do similar things, either unconsciously or otherwise.

Everyone is talkative all day. People are walking up to us just rattling off whatever English they know. One young man walks up to Jasper out of the blue and says, “It was my pleasure” in heavily accented English, and then he walks away. As with most of my travels it seems that it is the young and the old that I really click with. Everyone in the middle of their lives, concerned with career/family/etc, seems to be uninterested or too busy to really make the attempt. This is not always the case, but it seems to be a majority thing. Regardless, Jasper and I both feel like rockstars today. I truly hope to be able to carry this feeling of camaraderie through the rest of my travels and even back to the U.S. eventually.

It is a long night of discussion and I finally get to bed late. Later than I should to catch an early bus tomorrow for Bucaramanga.

As it turns out, I do not make it to the early bus. I barely make it out of bed in what might still pass for the morning. Lucky for me, there is still some cereal leftover and a tiny bit of milk. The same cannot be said for the chips. Someone over the night ate all the remaining 2 bags of chips, drank most of the milk and ate some of the cereal. Lame.

For a total of 16,000 pesos, or a little over $8 USD, I managed to get 4 breakfasts, 2 for me and 2 for Jasper, and 2 dinners, Guacamole and chips, and feed an unknown person a rather large amount of food and make fast friends over guacamole. There is truly something to be said for having a well kept kitchen in the hostel. That is a fantastic money savings, when many single meals cost about half of that total.

Time to head to the bus. Again, on the way to the metro and all the way on the metro, jasper and I are attracting anyone and everyone who can speak a lick of English or simply wants to talk to the gringos. I’m heading out to Bucaramanga because I hear they eat giant fried ants there. Anyone who eats giant ants is a person I need to meet. Jasper is off to Mamisales, but forgot that he needed the southern bus terminal until he was at the north bus terminal with me. We say our goodbyes and it just so happens the bus is leaving 5 minutes after I purchased my ticket.

The ride through the mountains is excruciating. The driver is absolutely flying down these twished mountain roads and I am about to puke the entire time I am awake. I manage to fall asleep about 2 hours into the ride and am awakened when we stop at the three hour mark.

Talking to people is awesome. I walk up to a guy and ask him the name of the town we are in. He then proceeds to answer me in English, and asks me to sit next to him on the bus. For the next 6 hours, Carlos Mario and I are back and forth in English and Spanish speaking of everything we can possibly formulate into words; economics, good baby names, paintings, drug trafficking, tourism, FARC, the political system in modern day Colombia, education, simply everything. Carlos gives me his card and tells me if I ever need anything in Colombia that I should call him. I could not have asked for a better day.

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