18 years: nearly two decades since my feet touched Nihon soil. My Japanese language skills are as rusty as any unused sword. Let’s see if they can still cut the natto.
Non-stop transpacific flights are still no joke. 13 hours in the air is not as daunting as it once was given the penetration of instant entertainment in the headrest of every seat. While domestic flights are packing seats in to more restrictive space in search of greater stockholder returns, one can still recline slightly on the long haul international planes with the more friendly carriers. JAL is one of those, though this flight is only run by a JAL partner.
After the snafu with the headphones on my last Lufthansa flight I purchased a couple 2 prong adapters for headphones. Fortunately, this flight doesn’t use the insane old school 2 prong jacks in favor of a single standard port. I know this because they angry old hobbit of a steward is waddling down the aisle lobbing headphones in the barely general direction of anyone asking for them. As we’ll soon see, it won’t matter if anyone actually receives them.
There is a margin of expected error in any travel… with the notable exception of German trains, which are single-handedly attempting to destroy the image of German precision. The take off of the flight to Haneda is within that margin and soon we are cruising above the clouds. Oddly, the tv screen in my headrest is unresponsive. Nearly 45 minutes into the flight, the speaker overhead crackles to life with an apologetic cough.
“Honored passengers, we are experiencing difficulties with the inflight entertainment and Wi-fi. The current state of our equipment is the level we will experience for the remainder of the flight. We apologize for any inconvenience. Mōshiwakenai.”
While I can’t imagine a bigger nightmare for a flight attendant than a couple hundred captive entitled Americans with no distractions for over half a day, I am also a little annoyed as now I am a captive entitled American with no distractions for the next half a day.
Buckle Up.