A Decade Between

10 years ago today, I loaded up a motorcycle and a girl in my new black truck and drove across the country for a 6 month opportunity.

6 months became 12.

12 became 18.

And 18 became innumerable. The months stretched on, and the motorcycle and the relationship both ended at their respective crash sites. I found more… and I kept crashing those, too.

Today, and every year for weeks around this anniversary, I pay special attention to those memories. I reach out to the friends who said goodbye to me that day; tears spilling down to run over chapped lips in the Arizona desert sun. I remember the salt of it.

This year, I bought am loading another motorcycle in the same truck. Where the old bike was blue, things are now black and red. Where things were once shiny, they are now battered and bruised; no longer new… we have that in common. It seems to fit better. Today, I’m alone, but it’s probably better for adventures on days like this. Easier to dwell on things… to remember.

I remember the hours driving across the country. The tastes of new and strange food on our lips and tales of adventure in our mouths. I remember the columns of trees lining the roads, our silent witnesses as we slept in a farmhouse in Tennessee named for a particularly violent local family.

The trees in this part of Texas line the sides of the road as well. I drive the whole afternoon with all the windows open. No one’s hair to muss but mine. The trees and the miles take me back. I smell the forests, again.

Things are wet here. The splashes of color even carry moisture that the Arizona desert never could. Color only brought in rare moments, or from the denizens thereof. My mind spirals away unsafely from the road before me. To the orange juice of lost mornings. To the waterwheel and stone at the end of that long road… and farther still; to the zinfandel and lipstick at the beginning of it.

Days like today are important. They carry your past for you. You need not hold all of these decisions every moment for you would surely collapse. Days like this wait patiently, and they encircle you, taking you to a place of remembrance. Taking you to a place of worship and honoring the moments that built you.

There are so many things in the rear view. There is a reason that the word “reflection” can mean so many things. Today, among them is a new motorcycle. Hopefully with it, new promises. Maybe ones that I will keep this time.

 

An Exit

Another grand adventure unfolds under my feet…

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Arriving at the airport today, I felt the hum of excitement building in me. The familiar return to a building that sees every permutation of human emotion every day. My experiences in airports have often been so emotionally charged that I can’t be near one without feeling that part of my guts that is tied to them twisting and dancing like a fish on a line. Today was no different.

The rampaging nerves peaked after I had my ticket in hand and hit the loo before I had to stand in the line for Security check. I was suddenly nervous almost to the point of panic. I had no idea what was waiting for me on the other end of this flight. I should run home and hide in the relative safety of my empty rented house and it’s lack of uncertainty.

I almost faltered; which was odd for me. This moment that was so foreign to this concept of who I am in my head, but is a real part of me and everyone and life! As much as I want to believe that I am dauntless, I have emotions and am far too often subject to the whims of adrenaline, hormones, and nerves. Recognizing the nerves as counter productive to what I had come to do, I strode into the security line and waited for them to pass. After some touch and grab with the TSA agents, I realized after I had passed through that the nerves were gone, replaced by calm confidence and anticipation for what lay ahead, rather than fear of it.

I think this happens to many of us, and it’s often hard to know what to do with it. I think without the guidance of some of my mentors and a very few close friends, I could have spent most of my life in that paralyzed state; running from uncertainty and never fully exploring myself or the world around me. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

Maybe that’s why so many people seem to get addicted to change, to pushing the boundaries, to the adrenaline rush… to love? We keep looking for something to make us feel alive. Point Break being a prime example.

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I had never heard of Condor airlines before I saw the billboard over the freeway as summer warmth cracked over Austin making motorcycling enjoyable again. Nonstop to Frankfurt. Condor Airlines. They aren’t new, just new to me, and they have the most attractive ticket and gate agents in Austin International by a fair margin. They’re doing something right.

The plane is not new, showing signs of work, but it is clean in the way that German things are. I am not new.  My passport is not new. The plane is certainly the cleanest of we three.

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Awakening in a different country is still a somewhat surreal occurrence. It’s as if you aren’t fully awake enough to read or understand what words are being spoken to you… but permanently so. Something like a never-ending concussion. The German populace is gracious and liberal in their application of English, and I’m a bit surprised to see police with rifles just wandering the airport as if this were commonplace; almost as if this were Ben Gurion rather than the financial capital of one of the more affluent countries in Europe, if not the world.

We’re not in Kansas.

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More later. 🙂

A Quickie

I am off again.

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The idea of a Eurotrip this summer actually materialized last year, but my partner dropped out. After the bombings and madness in Istanbul, I really started to worry about friends and wondered what their lives were live; I wanted to go see for myself. Add in that Zsofi is having her first baby, and Eda is getting married, and this is the first year Austria has hosted the MotoGP and I had all the reasons I could want to go back and visit.

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This is how I find myself sitting in a historic room in Frankfurt; jetlagged, tired, and grinning. I don’t know where I will sleep this weekend, but I brought a hammock and optimism, so I believe it will work out. 🙂

On the docket are Germany, Budapest, and Turkey; all of which I have been to before. Along with the old favorites, this trip will mark my first time to Austria, Belgium, Netherlands, France, Luxembourg, and Portugal!

Roughly a month abroad in all, which is almost a quickie for me. I have been looking for something to help me realign my perspective around my life, and I think this time away from home will be just the thing!

Stay tuned for more stories.

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American Sandwich

Helmet hair

And now it’s time for a new adventure. Starting in June, I left my old stomping grounds in Arizona, rode through Mexico, along the Sea of Cortez, and am now a third of the way up the Pacific Coast to Canada!

I’ve never been to Canada before, or to some of the parts of Mexico I saw, and I’ve certainly never driven a vehicle in either place. This has been exciting!

I’m late in posting, this, so I’ll catch up with photos and such later, but for now, I just wanted to throw some of this out there.

I’ll be heading to the Redwoods tomorrow, and then on to Oregon for the week of July 4th!

I am astride my trusty ’06 Suzuki SV-1000S, having turned nearly 30,000 miles on it myself, and it’s running like a dream. Hard to imagine that I’ve had this bike for almost 7 years now. In that time I’ve owned another 7 bikes, but my blue Juggernaut is the only one still around. We have a special bond.

Sonoma too

As always, the best part of my travels has been and will continue to be the people I get to spend time with. Followed closely by this unbelievably beautiful Earth that passes around me on the way.  If you, or your friends are along the Pacific Coast and reading this and want to catch up, shoot me a message! Looking forward to hearing from you.

P.S. If you can’t meet up with me, send me an email/text/whatever, and I’ll send you a postcard from some random place!

Foggy Golden Gate

Wishes and fishes

Driving home tonight, I am reminded of the things I wanted most when I was lost in the rest of the world; the warm embrace of a loved one, and to drive my own vehicle wherever I wanted. So simple, but so hard to find.

I look at the luxuries we afford ourselves; psychotherapy, massages, xxx, chiropractic care… and I marvel that anyone could be unhappy here.

I told everyone I encountered from any walk of life that I still believed the USA was the best place to live in the world. I believe that to this day. We have our issues here, for certain, and we have a quality of life that allows us to either overlook them or address them as we choose.

I am so fortunate to have the things I wanted most. A vehicle and the freedom to use it when and how I like. Loving friends and a beautiful significant other.

If someone hugged you today, and if you have freedom of movement, consider yourself fortunate, and please don’t squander those precious gifts. You already have everything you need.

Chicago: The Main Event!

I’m loose on the town for the next two days, and tonight I have the decided honor of being part of the panel of experts to take part in the MeetPlanGo National Event for 2011. And that isn’t even the best part…

They say, “Never meet your heroes.”

Today, I couldn’t disagree more. One of the largest influences on my taking the plunge and going around the world as I did, was a girl named Lisa Lubin. She answered all my tremulous questions with candor and solid information, and provided enough gentle prodding to continually motivate me to take the next step; whatever it may have been.

Lisa is the “Kick Ass Host” for the Chicago MPG event location, and invited me to be a part of the panel (waow!) and is hosting ME at her place for my time in Chicago.  To say she has the whole thing under control would be a gross understatement. Anyone who is fortunate enough to be in Chicago for the event tonight and listen to Lisa unravel the mystery of Global Domination is in for a rare treat.

I’m super pumped to be here, along with Lisa and the other panelists. I’m obviously biased in thinking that this is going to be the best of the National Event locations, but there are several more across North America. If you haven’t checked into this yet, please do so and if you have the chance, get to your local MPG event and hear what people who have “done it” have to say in response to your questions. This is an opportunity that only comes once a year, so go and get it!

Meet Plan Go 2011: Chicago!

I am really excited about this!

Since I’ve returned I have had a lot of conversations with people about the trip, and it’s been good, and sometimes hard, for me to talk about things; once I start really describing a place or event to someone else the memories come back and I start to remember all these little things that happened and it really takes me back there. I’ve even been told by a few people that it was inspiring and changed their lives for the better. I like that.

Now, coming up in October, Tuesday the 18th, I’ve been giving the opportunity to speak to an audience on a panel with a number of other people who have done similar amazing extended trips of their own.

Meet Plan Go is an organization that helps people to take career breaks (sabbaticals), and extended travels.  The group is full of inspiration, how to’s, and excuse-bashing-help for anyone trying to get away from a desk and off to the trip of a lifetime.

The Meet Plan Go National Event will be  held in 17 cities across the United States and Canada simultaneously on October 18th, and will have different panelists for each city to relay all their experiences and answer your questions about how you can achieve your travel goals.

If you are even curious about what a trip like this is comprised of or how your life would change if you decided to go for it, please take a look at the web site and see if there is anything there for you. Aaaand, heaven forbid, if you decide you would like to hear what I have to say about it in person, pick up a ticket to the Chicago event and let’s make it happen!

Wrap-Up:

Date: Tuesday, October 18th | Doors: 5:30pm
Kendall College | 900 N. North Branch Street

http://meetplango.com/national-event/

 

 

Training: Muay Thai and Massage

Quick update: I’m back in Thailand for more training. I’ll be here for about a month between Chiang Mai and Phuket Thai; massage, Reiki, and Muay Thai practice. Thai number is still the same:

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While we are all going about our lives, please, everyone who knows the Gonzales family, spare a moment of prayer or a phone call to let them know that even now we remember them and the light their son brought to our lives.

Giving Thanks: 2010 Edition

This year, I am in Israel. A place I really never thought I would go. And now I am here… looking for some semblance of purpose.

This place is full of purpose.

The populace here is surrounded by problems. They live in the shadow of war and go shopping with assault rifles. They know people who have died and have friends in captivity. And they smile. They laugh and smile every day.

The cab driver that shuffled me home one evening said that when we have these huge problems, we can be truly appreciative of the other stuff; the parts that slip through the cracks: the way she raises her eyebrows when I talk to her, sometimes, like she hears me with her entire body; the silly moments at breakfast; a warm touch from a friend; inside jokes that bind us with secret emotions to our loved ones.

Spending this year as I have, owning nothing I can’t carry, and with friends for only days at a time, I like to think that I truly appreciate these things. I know that I crave them. I see my friends and loved one in my dreams. I smile when I remember these parts of my life that have formed me into what I am. Daily, I am struck by something that reminds me of how uniquely magical this life is.

I have relied on strangers for so much this year. I have no one with me, and I must ask directions, food, lodging, honesty, transport, and anything else I need to survive from complete strangers. Some of them remain that way, while others have truly touched my heart and become brilliant stars in my universe.

This year, I spend Thanksgiving on a military base, surrounded by kids with guns who all have stories of their own. Every place I go reminds me of how much I love the USA and how fortunate I am to have been born there.

I am thankful for American smiles, and all the doors they open.

I am eternally grateful for the memories I have that keep my heart warm in the cool and my mind focused on the goal and remind me that in order to have memories like this we must live everyday with purpose and love.

Hope: the belief that all this will lead to something even greater. The hope that I will create something great with my experiences and be able to give all that I have back to the world in some fashion.

Never take something for free. A very wise warrior told me this.

I try to go out of my way to tell everyone how thankful I am for their help. It is the people who enrich and affect my life daily that will help me to give back to the world around me. If I haven’t had the opportunity to take you by the hand and look you in the eye and express my thanks for the influence you have had on my life recently, then know that I am speaking to you now.

Thank you. Thank you for all that you do and all that you are and all that you have been to me.

In the USA, today is a day of Thanksgiving. Today, in this far off place, I give thanks to you; for you.

So, I leave again…

North Carolina.

Independence. U-haul. Tears. Bus.

New York.

Jasper. Running through Brooklyn. Eating Red Bamboo. High Line. Dumpling house. Pictures of pictures.

New Jersey.

Train. Bus. Airport.

The ground is flying by so fast my head and heart are spinning. it’s blurring and this cabin is so sterile. I want to taste the USA one last time; I want to hear it and feel like it is home and know it will welcome me back with more than promises and empty potential… but I do not.

The world tumbling away. It is slipping, sliding, melting past so fast that I can barely see. I want to claw at it, to grab it and hold on, but it would only slide through my fingers. I want to grab at the window and hold it but it’s going, going, gone . Soon I will be left with only this empty black over an endless ocean.

But tomorrow is a new morning, a new continent, a new world.